Letter of self-introduction
Subject: Letter of self-introduction
Dear Professor Blackstone,
I, Akmal Rusyaidi, a freshman of
SIT engineering Robotics Systems, am writing this formal letter for you to have
a better understanding of how I am as a person. I graduated from Republic
Polytechnic, engineering. As you can tell, my path of education falls towards the
engineering industry.
Even though I have passion for engineering, I have zero work experience. However, I once participated in a
competition and its objective was to build an electric vehicle from scratch
that mimics how a car functions. I feel this is the closest I got to in terms
of “experience” in this industry. Working hand in hand with my peers such as, producing 3D designs on SolidWorks eventually had an advantage here in SIT.
I can socially interact with a
person well. I never liked being placed in an awkward situation, so I often
find topics in common to converse. Moreover, I like to tell people that I'm a barber. In return, this gives me the business opportunity to make me grow as a barber. I see this as an opportunity to grow not only as a person but skills as well.
I’ll be frank; I am not the
most academically gifted student. I did
not graduate my diploma with any merit or a 3.0 GPA and if I’m honest, modules that
requires a strong foundation of English Language is probably my Achilles heel.
But I always do my best to provide as a team member and during class participation.
At the end of this module, I’d
like to be able to converse with more confidence and fluency, be it with
someone or presenting in front of a crowd. In addition, I hope to maintain the
discipline of effective communication. If I practice now, I’m sure I’ll come
out as a better speaker or presenter.
Yours Sincerely,
Akmal Rusyaidi
Akmal has shown how his participation in an electric vehicle building competition led to his interest in engineering, and clearly explained his communication strength and weakness. Here are some changes you could make to improve your letter.
ReplyDelete1. “Even though I have passion for engineering,” should be changed to “I have a passion” due to the article use
2. “not only as a person but skills as well.” should be changed to “but in skills as well” due to preposition
Thanks for the letter.
After reading this post, I feel Akmal is a very objective-focused and passionate person.
ReplyDeleteJust a few typos to point out;
1. "a freshman of SIT..."(Preposition); a freshman 'at' SIT
2. "I have passion for engineering(Article usage) ; should be 'have a passion..'
3."modules that requires"(Verb form); should be 'modules that require'
This comment has been removed by the author.
DeleteOutstanding post Akmal, I like how you have a passion to be an engineer and I am proud to be part of your journey. There are just some typos that needed to be corrected.
ReplyDelete1. a freshman of SIT - it is a preposition error and it should be "a freshman at SIT"
2. have passion for engineering - article use and it should be " have a passion for.."
Thank you for your letter.
Dear Akmal,
ReplyDeleteThanks for the detailed yet fairly concise letter. I appreciate the content aligned with your interest in engineering and studying at SIT. It's also interesting to learn about your perceived communication strength and weakness. We can see that you're open about providing an honest self-assessment.
What I'm most curious about is your barbering. Is that a real vocation? I can;t tell from the way you address the topic.
There are some other issues with language use. You need to review this statement in particular:
-- Working hand in hand with my peers such as, producing 3D designs on SolidWorks eventually had an advantage here in SIT. > (meaning?)
Your other readers have also commented, though the critique is not always accurate.
Still, I look forward to reading more of your writing this term.
Cheers,
Brad
Dear Professor Brad,
DeleteThank you for your insightful comments. Regarding barbering, it is not a real vocation. Rather, it is a skillset I picked up about a year ago which I personally found to be extremely useful of this age. I only mentioned it because it is just something I like to tell people about. It is a way for me to connect with people. I understand that it is no where near related to engineering or robotics but it is just for sharing.
As quoted "Working hand in hand with my peers such as, producing 3D designs on SolidWorks eventually had an advantage here in SIT". Here I was trying to infer that my experience with SolidWorks in the past made an impact on my 3D design modelling. Back then, I was working in a project heavily reliant on SolidWorks with my polytechnic peers. I was able to explore other ways to produce drawings due to my peers past experience. Hence, working alongside with them expanded my knowledge as I was able to make use of it to my current module.
Hope this makes you understand better.
Cheers,
Akmal
Very nice and sincere letter Akmal, I can feel your passion for robotics through the tone of your letter. As others have pointed out, the grammar could be refined but I very much liked reading your letter nevertheless
ReplyDelete